A past, present, and future thought(to come)...

Last night was a late one, 2am to be exact...sometimes ya gotta make a few sleeping sacrifices in order to catch up with closest friends. It was so worth it, although I am just short of "the nod" right now. Anywho, I was reminded of a verse in Romans 8 last night which made me think...I should just read that whole stinkin' chapter, I need it all!! And it certainly was nothing less than perfect.

Onto the present. Today, I am going to visit one of my dearest college friends and one of the 5 roommates I had last year. I am soooo excited for several reasons. For one, this friend means alot to me because of her love for the Lord and her consistant prayers for me, so I am just excited to see her face. She is one of 4 of us who are very close and keep an e-mail update chain throughout the week. Just sayin...

Reason #2: We are going snowboarding/skiing. I cannot tell you how happy I am about this. Probably because neither one of us are pros in the snow, so I am going to get some good, gut-wrenching laughs in fo sho! AND, I get to actually take my snowboard out on real slopes, not just the "mountains" of Lynchburg. I'm sure I'll blog about how that goes. :)

Reason #3: Banana bread muffins with chocolate chips in them. Oh my word, how I miss waking up to these in college. They are yummy with a nice cup of milk! (As much as this sounds like an idol, it's not. I promise if food ever becomes an idol you have permission to call me out on it.) ;)

Reason #4: Contra dancing. It all started back during some war when the french were our allies and they renamed what american's called "country dancing," to contra dancing because of their inability to pronounce the word right. While I very much appreciate country land, I am by no means a redneck so take that into consideration before you read any further. It's basically learning to line dance along with other sweet moves and is a great work-out at that. Anyway, it is not hard to learn once you get the basics and it is SO FUN. I really enjoy twirling in my skirt, but that only happens once you get real good...haha. If you want to learn more about this random dance or ever want to go to one, feel free to contact me. I'm always game.

Reason #5: I'm sure I will get to meet some people, and that's always a blast! PLUS, I get to see a "new" friend of mine(her name is Jenny) who is so fun to be around and has a sweet heart! yay.

Stay tuned... in the near future, I will blog about my adventures in Boone, NC!!!

p.s. My friend's name is Sarah, but I call her Sarahbelle...has a nice ring to it.

3 Words

I can't help but to wonder back to a conversation I had with a best friend of mine awhile back about life. As much as I've learned over the past few years, I'm still learning. Right when I thought my head would explode with so much information on various subjects and life lessons. But it hasn't yet, and I can only attribute that to the simplicity and beauty of the Gospel that is played out in my life daily. Each morning I wake up, grace and mercy from the Lord's hand await me for the day and ultimately are what sustain me, nothing else. His grace is sufficient and His right hand will sustain. When I choose to embrace and accept that, my day usually starts off great! Anyway, sometimes when my eyes are taken off of the prize(keywords: when my eyes are taken off the prize), I wonder what the purpose of certain things are that take place in my life. Sometimes this turns more into a prayer question than merely a wonder and I am always answered with the three simple words, FOR MY GLORY. And that is enough. That's all I need to hear, and then I am thankful for the privilege to walk through these circumstances, whatever they may be in any given day. If he becomes more, and I become less, it is well with my soul. If I can be reminded of the Lord my Savior, my Redeemer and the gospel of grace through the circumstances that take place, then give me the best and worst of them. Strength will rise as we wait upon the Lord, so my heart will take courage and wait upon the Lord, yet again...and again. My heart will rest in his steadfast love and I will rejoice, for I have been set free!

The Road

At least twice a week I find myself journeying down a very nice stretch of a road that I travel on for about 50 minutes. I started traveling this road during time when I wasn't sure where I was really going in life and find myself still traveling this road...in both case scenarios. How timely the Lord's analogies are as I've grown to love this road, or better put, the time I spend on it. It is a sweet time, a time of brokenness, a time of wonder, and a time of laughter, all in one sometimes. The obvious thing about this road is that I can't really get to my destination without traveling it. The greatest thing about this road is God and my experiences with Him. On this road, my theology meets my reality...this is faith.



The last sentence defines faith according to beth moore...I find it an accurate definition.

There's not really a part 2 :)

"For the word of the Lord is right and true;
he is faithful in all he does.
The Lord loves righteousness and justice;
the earth is full of his unfailing love."

"We wait in hope for the Lord;
he is our help and our shield.
In him our hearts rejoice,
for we trust in his holy name.
May your unfailing love rest upon us,
O Lord,
even as we put our hope in you."

Ps. 33:4-5, 20-22

v-day(part 1)

Is it bad that I have just now thought about it being valentines day? Some may say that I'm not a hopeless romantic for that and I would say that just isn't so....to a degree. Deep down, like every other girl, I am longing(sometimes more than others) for my knight in shining armor to come sweep me off my feet and give me a big smooch on the lips(once engaged?haha)...but today is not that day! What today is, however, is another day to be thankful for, to feel loved by my Savior who gave his life for me on the Cross...there is no greater love and for me and His is enough, simply put.

but...I can wait. I can wait for the perfect love of my life to come along, for however long it takes. I'm not niaeve enough to think he will be perfect though, don't worry... I don't expect that!

Anywho, this is just a random thought...once again not really the depths of my heart or anything but I almost felt obligated to write something about this today for some reason(ie. it's v-day!!!). :) And I am very much excited that my parents will be taking my sister and I out for dinner, dad will be with the 3 girls he loves the most...woot!

Enough

God is the same yesterday, today, and forever. He is our Rock, our refuge, our fortress and mighty deliverer. He is a strong tower, our comforter, our Healer, our restorer, our ever present help in time of need. He is everlasting, all-knowing, all-powerful, Creator, Savior, King, sovereign. He was, is, and always will be this and so much more.

Who can compare to our God? For who is God besides the Lord?, And who is the Rock except our God? (Ps. 18)

This is somewhat common knowledge, but when I sit back and meditate on this it becomes so much more...real. It becomes belief, not just knowledge. And when you truely believe this, it's amazing how little we become. God is all we need. Circumstances and life itself can sometimes become distracting and painful, so naturally we run to God with our boo boo and He just restores us and cares for us and puts us back together so lovingly. How He delights in His children is beyond me, but I am thankful nonetheless. He loves when we rely on Him, when we seek Him and ask for grace. He is a gracious and loving God, slow to anger and abounding in love. I love who God is, he is certainly Enough.

College

I really really really miss the memories that accompanied college right about now. As I talked with one of my best friends last night briefly, we reminisced once again about the good times we spent together and how being apart is pretty stinky. She and I were butt buddies last year especially and were both nursing majors so we pretty much did everything together. But I miss our talks the most, how we would have to schedule quality talk time for like an hour here and there with our study loads being so heavy, but it always turned out to be several hours...which was nice. We would get away from school(most of the time we'd hit up our friends-the employees...at Bojangles) and sit and talk about the Lord. I miss that alot. We would talk about areas of weakness, sometimes in one another and we'd discuss scriptures and things we didn't understand. The conversation was always centered around the Lord and seasoned with Grace...most of the time accompanied by much much LAUGHTER. She always challenged me in a loving way to pursue my Savior, that for which I am eternally grateful for. She didn't always do this verbally, her life in general is that of a Prov. 31 woman and I can't say that about myself or many others right now. Sorry, I didn't mean to ramble, I just really miss her. :)

Some of my favorite college memories from my senior year:
1. swimming laps and talking in the jacusee(sp?) w/Ash afterwards.
2. Our apartment, the beephouse and all the joy and laughter that flowed from there on a daily, minute by minute basis.
3. Seeking the Lord with close friends.
4. I miss mother/baby clinicals.
5. The Christian fellowship that surrounded me.
6. Being taught in great detail the Word of God from the church I went to.
7. Talking on the phone to one of my other best friends on our wabbly wooden porch deck in the back that will fall any day now. :)
8. Random road trips with the video camera acting SILLY, really really silly.
9. Hiking
10. Defining the song "GIRLS JUST WANNA HAVE FUN" with my roommates. :)

I am very blessed, college was the BEST and now the Lord is taking care of me, revealing to me His plans one step at a time...how exciting!!!

Communication

I really enjoy communication. I enjoy both talking and listening, both writing and reading it, and especially old fashioned communication like letters and phone calls-they are the best. I'm not sure why, but the movie Little Women comes to my mind as I type this. I LOVE that movie, I love how important family and relationships were in that movie and how there were less distractions to take them away from those important gifts from God. Don't get me wrong, I really really really appreciate technology ALOT, sometimes too much...just trying to find the balance. I think I'd be okay without it. I don't remember actually ever reading this book, but I could probably identify with "Sarah Plain and Tall" (even though I'm not so tall)...it's the simple things in life that I find great joy in, yippee.

*Random* I'm reading in Exodus and it is SO dog on good. Many thoughts about that right now...

crying

Sometimes I just love crying. I mean not when is out of sadness really, although that happens, but moreso just when I need a good cry. It's so healthy for you and feels really good. Pretty much just like a good laugh, I mean a goooood laugh. You know how you laugh all the time and at little stuff(okay maybe that's just me), and sometimes you cry(get teary eyed) all the time at stuff but there's just nothing like a side-splitting laugh or a heart wretching wailing. Just saying...I think I might want to cry tonight, it probably won't happen, but it would be great. :)

My best friend is about to go on tour in March and April. She will be releasing the most recent CD she's been working on at the end of April titled "The Invitation," and it's phenominal. She is kind of a big deal :). haha...I do love her to death, I love the fact that she is always herself and treats everyone the same, even if she does end up "famous." I think about how far the Lord has brought her and reminisce in my head of the thousands of conversations we've had the past 5 years ish and how I always knew deep down God would be big in her music and He would bless her and entrust her with things bigger than herself. Anyway, just thought I'd insert this, because I was just thinking about her. If you ever get a chance, check her blogspot out, its one of the web addresses on the left of this page. I love her music, ministry, etc. and I can't figure out if I am bias or not, for real. k, done.

Another thing I love is water. I wish I could live in water. I can't really go near water without getting in or at least touching it...which makes for a very cold time if its winter. I once jumped in the fountain at Liberty, but who hasn't? :)

read away

Just FYI(disclaimer): I think that this blog is more for entertainment than for personal spilling...or both. Because my brain goes 1 million miles an hour it's impossible for me to write all that I am thinking in great depth, but boy is it there. So instead what I write up here tends to be a little lighter than who I am, just wanted to clear that up cuz...it's all about me anyway. ;)

Okay, now that I'm past what all of you may think of me(all 2 of you who have read this) I will share a bit of what I'm thinking, a very wee bit.

Coffee: coffee makes me ambitious, REALLY ambitious about life, in every area of life. Seriously, if you want to do a case study for the effects of caffiene/coffee I'm your woman. It is a high that I don't get anywhere else nor do I get it on purpose. Sometimes I just like to drink coffee type stuff. But don't worry, I refuse to pay 3-4 dollars for it. :) hmm, another good topic.

Money: I hate money, I've decided I don't mind being poor and living as such. It would be even greater for that to happen as a result to me giving all that I possess or my riches towards the kingdom of God or to show His love to less fortunate. I'm no saint for saying that because I don't care if that's not what happens, I still probably wouldn't mind if I had nothing. :) I could seriously care less about stuff, I think it's part of my personality so it's lucky for me that it goes hand in hand with the teachings of the Word! It's very very hard living in settings with exact opposite opinions. Oh well. (somebody remind me of this post when I'm filthy rich)... :) (that was a joke).

Nature: I love nature, I'll often ride by a wooded area and just think...man I would love to just walk/hike with no purpose but to be alone in creation with God and enjoy the freedom and adventures unplanned.

Friends: I could write a book on this subject. I have the best, that's all I'm saying. Yea yea, everybody says that but I say that according to the definitions/truths of the Word.

Love: I am always humbled by this topic it seems, especially dealing with patience. LOVE IS PATIENT. It's so true, when I am about to be impatient with someone I love I think...no, for me to tell this person I love them would be a lie if I am always so impatient, etc. C.J. Mahaney said in one of his books (Humility) that impatience is linked with pride. So true. I want to love like 1 Cor. 13:1-8.

Knowledge: I don't possess enough of it. :)

k I'm done...I reach this point once I start analyzing everything I've said or think too hard about what else I want to say.

Unprepared

I just want to write out everything I am feeling right now, nothing extremely significant or profound...just a little bit of me!

I am taking classes towards grad school right now. I hope to apply and get in for the fall semester. But I am learning it is DIFFERENT from undergrad, extremely. I can't figure out if that is good for me or not. You see, there is a ton of reading and writing involved-both of which I feel my skill level in these areas is very inadequate. Not just reading or just writing, but communicating analytical data and information learned from reading/writing. My brain is just not naturally geared that way. I have more of a free spirited, love everything, hippy brain (what?). Don't get me wrong, I absolutely LOVE to read things I enjoy learning about, it's just the analyzing data, etc. that I'm not so great at. Hmm, I think I may have not painted the right picture of me in your heads. What I mean by the free-spirited brain(haha) is simply that its not that I hate analyzing data or reading it, I just like to do it at my own pace in my own way. k, done here.

I am working full time now so school is not exactly my number 1 priority, but it will be in 2 weeks when I quit my job. I think I will feel better about my performance in this area at that time. Right now, I have a 1 1/2 page paper to write(I just found out a/b it this morning) by 4pm and 3 articles to read. Yea, I know...if I keep it up like this I'll never make it through grad school. Anyway, I was challenged and convicted by Hebrews 12:11 last night, I've got to start praying that out loud daily, for school and NCLEX purposes. If I can just keep God at the center of my gaze, my entire gaze, maybe I'll be more inclined to be disciplined in the area of my studies for HIS glory if for nothing else. That's all that matters anyway. After all, when you love someone with your entire, whole heart and self, it is the desire of your heart to please them and you delight in being beautiful to them in every area of life. Good thing the Lord's love is unconditional and He sees me as His beautiful daughter no matter what!

I am writing this before I do my assignment to calm my nerves down before I look at what exactly I have to write about so I don't get anxious or freak out about not being prepared for the 2 classes I have tonight...God's peace is a wonderful feeling.

Class is getting better, still adjusting to it being more secular in conversation and atmosphere and praying for wisdom in how to live out my faith boldly in this setting. My heart breaks for my professors, I have not gotten to know many more other people as most of them are busy medical students, medical doctors, or serve in some other health capacity full-time aside from school. I have to constantly remind myself to be confident in the Lord's calling on my life and trust him. On that note, I really should start my paper now.

I DO care that I am representing Christ to my fellow student colleagues and professors and fear the Lord greatly in this matter, that is another reason for me to strive to do well. k, done..